View User Request

My Account

help please!
I have 3 kids. When they were younger there behavior was the best ever. They told us everthing and listen to everthing they where told to do. But now my oldest (10 year old) will not talk to me about anything thats going on with her. She is starting to have issues with school, friends, and everthing. I try to talk to her and help, but she never wants to tell me anything. Then my middle kid (8 years old) is was getting in problem. He is was yelling and saying mean things to my husband and me. He acts like if he was the parent here. And if we tell him something he doesnt like, he just starts to yell and cry. And last, there is my youngest (7 year old) is always mad and borned. She also yells and say mean things to her dad and me. She also thinks that she is the parent here. Plus there are all 3 always frighting with each other. Like if they were enemy. I have try everything but i dont know what am doing wrong. Please i need help getting my family together again.
Posted By : lashorty85 Date: 5 SEP 2013

If you are a therapist , Please login here to respond.
Hi lashorty85,

Thank you for your interest in Proven Therapy. I'm sorry to read that you're experiencing challenges with your three children. In early adolescent stage, children interactions at home with parents, and siblings, at school with peers and teachers, and normal life transitions pose negative effects on their development and behavior. Individual and family counseling with the children can help improve parenting practices and positive developmental outcomes for your 3 developing children.

I am a licensed mental health therapist with more than 25 years in counseling parents and children. I can help you and your children to change behaviors to live a more happier life and get your family together once again. You can contact me at http:www.proventherapy.com/diane-470.html

Sincerely,
Diane Davis
I
Response By: Dr. Diane Davis Date: 8 SEP 2013

Hello, 
It is a tough experience to handle when your kids react to your parenting.In the recent times you find the interactions in the family disturbing. You talked abut the behaviour of your three children which certainly is difficult for a mother to handle. All three of them say and do things that disturb you and your husband. You talked about the kids but you did not say anything about you and your husband. It appears there is a big disconnection between you and your kids. Only through counselling process one can find out the issues and help all of you to make family life better. Kindly contact us with a detailed email giving us a comprehensive view of the situation and your needs. We are here to help you. With good regards

Response By: Dr. Joseph George Date: 6 SEP 2013

To an extent, the behaviour of your children is normal. Work needs to be done to increase their attention span to read or play by themselves. Television and computes time needs to be cut down and your approach must change.
Response By: Prof. Aleksandar Fatic Date: 6 SEP 2013

Hi! I am sorry to hear about your family situation.  Your concerns and reaching out for help show that you are a good mother, who just needs some parenting tips (we all need that at some point in our life). You didn't do anything wrong in raising them but yes there are things that could have done differently.  Parenting is a daunting task and no one tells us how to do it right.  Every family is different and every child is different, hence we have to work accordingly.  From your email, I understand that children think they are the boss of the houseóChildren donít have the wisdom and experience to be parents, but you do, so all you and your husband need is parenting tips on how to get back being the parents your children needs.  Also, itís important that children get some counseling on behaviors/manners.  Once older siblings start behaving better, then younger ones are more likely to follow that model (as right now they are learning negative behaviors from one another).  I am interested in knowing what types of rules and boundaries/discipline/rewards you have had for them throughout these years.  Children need rules, boundaries/disciplines and structures depending on their age.  

We have a wonderful team of experienced psychologist/therapists so please make your decision and get help soon.

Always breathe and stay positive,

Regards, Juni Shrestha

Response By: Juni Shrestha Date: 6 SEP 2013

Hello,
Sorry to read about your plight. But the present 
Generation children are tough nuts to crack am it takes a lot of learning
And patience to raise them. 
Nothing is impossible and we are here to help you get through this rough patch. 
You are definitely going to need sessions with a counsellor and therapist for over 
A period of time and continuos sessions. 
Please pick a therapist and get into counseling sessions without wasting any time. 
You can choose the mail option which will work well and cheaper 
On your pocket too. 
Hope u decide soon. 
Good luck always
Sharanya

Response By: Dr. Sharanya Dinesh Date: 5 SEP 2013

Your children are at a stage of defining themselves as separate from you, their parents. During this stage enlisting objective perspectives can be very useful. How do we stay engaged and loving while being clear and firm with boundaries? There are plenty of great therapists here to choose from and we are all here to help support and guide during just these type of situations!
Response By: Eric Holmes Date: 5 SEP 2013

Hello,
I would love to help you and your family get back together.  Of course, things will change as they get older and try to figure out who they are and maybe some of the behavior is being learned.  I think it is important that each child is really given the chance to share what is being on and to be heard.  That may need to be through a neutral party, like a counselor.  I would be happy to work with you and your family.
Response By: Kari Schulz Date: 5 SEP 2013