Challenging Your Negative Thoughts
M.G. Lazarus PhD.
A thought creeps in repeatedly means it would start exercising great influence on
you. Your feelings are determined by the nature of thoughts either you entertain within
your mind or they coming to you without your permission. Nobody wants to develop a negative feeling and put himself/herself down. This
means that you need to challenge your negative thoughts if you want to feel great.
Every emotion is associated with a corresponding
thought. If I say that I feel sad, there should be an associated thought behind
this feeling. It is easy to find the associated thought by completing the statement:
‘I feel sad because I think……..’ The completed statement might be: ‘I feel sad because
I think nobody loves me’. What is the catch? The second phrase is causing the feeling.
This implies that changing the thought should help one to feel better. How to change
the negative thought that coming to you without your permission? Yes, it is very
hard to say ‘no’ to such thoughts. Even if you know that such negative thoughts
are not helping you in any way, they simply come in to cause more distress and eventually
to put you in depression.
Be In Charge!
When you are in danger, either you can fight back to dominate
the danger or run away from the danger. When it is a negative thought that is causing
stress, you cannot run away because the thought is inside your mind and wherever
you go, your mind follows you, eventually, the thought as well. Some people find
temporary relief by causing distraction. But, it is hard to distract your mind every
time the thought coming to your mind, and also it won’t guarantee a permanent escape
from the negative thought. So, the best strategy is to fight back. To be in charge! But how?
Psychotherapists rely on Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) in order to help clients to fight back
the negative thoughts by challenging their negative thoughts. The negative thoughts
would be logically tested with reality so that the paranoid mind gets clarity on
the meaninglessness of such thoughts, which many clients admit as ‘crazy ideas’
or ‘stupid thoughts’ once they see the real picture. Another method of fighting
back is by simply replacing the associated negative thought with a counter script
which is a positive one. ‘I feel happy because I know that everybody loves me’ would
be a counter script to the previously stated negative statement. Hypnosis or hypnotherapy
is another alternative in order to register positive ego strengthening script into
the mind. Guided imagery methods are yet another effective and powerful method to
get rid of the negative anticipation and worries.
Some Tips to Challenge the Negative Thoughts
- You may feel sad or worried because of the negative thoughts. Just remember
that it is the way you think. It doesn’t mean it is true.
- Try to be aware of
what you are saying to yourself when you are feeling bad, sad or worried. Replace
that negative thought with a positive one.
- Challenge the reasonableness of your
negative thoughts.
- Find time to enjoy your life. Listening to music, reading
a good novel, watching pleasurable programs on television, aerobics, going out,
visiting places, taking a break from work, shopping, etc. are some of the options
you could try.
- Socialize with your peer groups. Share your worries with someone
whom you can trust the most.
- Do not feel embarrassed to talk to a Counselor or
Psychotherapist. They are genuine persons who are specifically trained in this area.
You will feel much better if you take the counseling or psychotherapy session voluntarily.
© Copy Right: 2007, M.G.
Lazarus PhD.
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